Category: Food Boner

The Dump Cake Dump Cake

I was out shopping for an Easy Bake Oven one day when I stumbled upon a cookbook, called Quick & Easy Dump Cakes. It’s by a lady named Cathy Mitchell. Many friends on Facebook and on Twitter have been regularly sending me photos of this book. It says a lot about my childish adult life that at least four people thought I should… Read more →

The Sexual Chocolate Valentine’s Day Cake

Call me a sap, but I have a soft spot for Valentine’s Day. Before everyone goes into a tirade about how Valentine’s Day is some bullshit made-up holiday by Hallmark and card companies, it’s really an ancient holiday. The romantic part started during the High Middle Ages, supposedly having something to do with Geoffrey Chaucer. But right now none of… Read more →

THE ULTIMATE GAMEDAY SNACK: THE TOM BRADY

I’ve mentioned it before, but I don’t generally watch much football. You may not believe me because my last recipe was The Chicago Italian Beef Combo Bloody Mary, aka Coach Juice, which is simply a dumb coincidence.  But, every year, I do go to Superbowl parties because if I don’t, I’ll spend that Sunday as I do most Sundays, which… Read more →

A Critical Look into the Cuisine of Medieval Times Dinner and Tournament

Medieval Times Dinner and Tournament is basically the greatest place on earth. It’s dinner theater (how much of this luxury even exists anymore?), with medieval-style games, including jousts, swordfights, horse dancing, and more. I’d been shouting at the castle every time I’d driven by it on the highway, and my friend Julie, who’s been sick of listening to me scream at… Read more →

Jerked Cock and Balls Soup

Fusion cuisine glues multiple types of ethnic food together and creates new dishes, merging the flavors of one region with another. One of the more popular things these days is smushing anything with Mexican food; Los Angeles has a famous fleet of trucks called Kogi (“kogi” is the Korean word for meat). They were the guys to put Mexican-Korean tacos on… Read more →

Smoked Shrimp, Smoked Fingers, Smoked Happiness

I’m originally from the north suburbs of Chicago, and I’ve been living in the Ukrainian Village neighborhood for about a billion (ten) years now. And I think I was probably the last food nerd I know to go to the lonely-looking Calumet Fisheries on the 95th St bridge. Yes, it’s located on an actual bridge, which certainly makes it unique.… Read more →